At times I’ve felt my heart holding on to a good feeling, or a fun or loving moment, as it fades away and turns to something opposite. The attempt to hold on is like that frustrating experience in bowling when the ball is going down the lane, heading towards the gutter, and from a distance I’m trying to push the ball back into the lane with the psychic force of my body.
I figure the resistance to change is part of the human condition. And from my experience it seems to be the source of suffering. No wonder, I’m going against change, the very basis of life.
I remember that scene from Superman with Christopher Reeve where Lois Lane dies near the end of the movie. Superman can’t take it, and with his superhuman force flies around the Earth, rewinding time, allowing him to save Lois. Unfortunately I don’t have that kind of power.
I guess I might be growing up, because sometimes I get the feeling that I can’t continuously have something I like. Some things are going to hurt and I’m not going to like them. It doesn’t make me happy, but I get a gentle peace of mind.